In Praise Of Club Soda Martinis

Mick, the bartender at Eats NYC, in the background, with his soon-to-be-famous club soda martinis up front.

I do most of my drinking at home, and most of that drinking is done for work, so I’m not a regular at too many bars. One of the few is Eats NYC, a nondescript place on East 74th where you can find me most Wednesdays from 4:15-5:15, hanging out with a couple of friends while I wait for my daughter to finish her after-school activities. I used to partake regularly of their $10 martini happy hour specials, paired with $1 oysters. But doing so after a booze-filled lunch event, or before an evening event, was making me feel pretty sluggish. So one Wednesday when I’d arrived at Eats before my friends, I asked Mick, our jovial bartender, to put some club soda in a cocktail glass with a twist of lemon, and I’d pass it off as a martini. The ruse was pulled off without a hitch — until my pals realized Mick was refilling my “martini” periodically, and with a soda gun.

Since then, whenever I’ve bellied up to the bar at Eats on a Wednesday for 4 o’clocktails, Mick sets me up with a club soda martini. I used to be ashamed to be known for something so mundane, but I’ve come to realize it’s actually kind of cool. The glass and the twist of lemon make me feel like I’m drinking, without the alcohol AND without the sugar-laden fruit juices that go into most mocktails (Seedlip hasn’t hit this particular bar yet). I even find that I sip my club-tini at the same slow pace I’d take on the real thing. I wouldn’t recommend it as a full-time substitute for a glass full of ice-cold gin and vermouth (and orange bitters, natch), but in a pinch it comes in pretty handy.