The Cure For Booze Snobbery, AKA My New, Er, "Gig"

My booze closet. Not to be confused with my booze wall. Photo by me.

I’ve written a whole lot of articles about spirits and cocktails over the last… jeez, can it really be 14 years?! I’ve done deep dives into various matters of boozy arcana. I’ve interviewed a lot of distillers, brand ambassadors, and various experts. I’ve chronicled events and trips and what have you. But when anyone has asked me — and they’ve asked me all too rarely, but that’s OK — what I really want to write about, my answer is usually, “The thing I enjoy most is writing about a new bottle that knocks me out, and explaining what makes it so cool and why it’s so delicious.”

Well, I’ve gotten my wish. Sort of.

Liquor.com, which is currently helmed in part by the amazing Kathryn Maier — my former Robb Report editor, and still one of my favorite people to work with — is starting a Bottle Review section. At some point I must have told her about my love of bottle reviews, because she tapped me for the job, along with my longtime compadre Robert Haynes-Peterson. A dream come true!… with a catch. I don’t get to choose what I write about. As luck would have it, I’ve gotten to write up plenty of bottles that I already knew and loved. But a fair amount is stuff that I not only wouldn’t normally drink, but would actively avoid. I won’t name any names… although one of the bottles I’ve reviewed rhymes with “Shmalibu.”

But over the several weeks I’ve spent writing up various bottles, I’ve come to appreciate having to get out of my comfort zone. You see, I’m a self-confessed booze snob. And when I get to pick and choose what I write up, it’s not really a problem. I can tell you all about the subtleties and nuances of a great bourbon or rum or single malt. But when writing up a flavored whiskey or a spiced rum, I can’t just spew 600 words about how it shouldn’t exist. I have to take it on its own merits. It doesn’t matter if I like or don’t like spiced rum in general, what matters is whether the one I’m reviewing is a good one.

I’ve made some fun discoveries so far. Take my first published review, for Rémy Martin’s 1738 Accord Royal cognac (here’s the link!). I couldn’t tell you the last time I voluntarily drank anything Rémy Martin, but it was surprisingly good — and the brand’s XO expression (review forthcoming) is legitimately great in my opinion. Go figure!

When it comes to drinking for pleasure, I confess I’m still a booze snob. But in my capacity as Bottle Reviewer-At-Large, I say bring it on. Bring it all on.