The Five Categories Of Tequila, And How To Drink Them

A lot of agaves gave their lives for this pic. (Photo by Holger Leue/Corbis)

In the not-too-distant past, I asked a tequiliero of some distinction what he thought of cristalino tequila, the new category embraced by a growing number of brands, and presumably tequila consumers as well. He leaned back in his chair, a little smile creased his lips, and he said, “You want to know what I think of cristalino? I’ll tell you what I think. It’s the biggest f***ing fraud ever perpetrated on the industry.” Alas, I was asked to not use his name. In fact, very few people want to go on the record talking about cristalino, even distillers who make the stuff. I suspect cristalino is largely the product of R & D and marketing departments rather than an organic creation from people who love tequila. Or maybe I’m just biased because I too think cristalino is an abomination.

If you’re wondering what cristalino is, may I humbly direct you to my article for the good folks at InsideHook (link is -> HERE <-), where you’ll find out more about its history and its specs, along with more legit tequila categories from blanco to extra añejo. Is it a little bit of mansplaining? I’ll let you be the judge. Is it helpful and informative? I hope so.